Craziest decision (that proved to be the best）
It was the craziest decision to go to this Yoga Teacher Training in Feb 2018 in Bali.
I just got back to China from Bali in January 2018, and was going to fly back home to Europe after 3 months of being away from home in 2 days. When I saw Yoga Teacher Course randomly online, I thought: it’s impossible to go.
As I’d have to spend lots of money to change the flights to Europe, buy the flights to Bali just 2 weeks after being back in China, and pay 3000 USD for the YTT, and find a babysitter to take care of my 4 year old girl in Bali while I would be in the Yoga Teacher Training—all of which seemed impossible to arrange in such a short time!
But then I heard the calling inside me: do that Yoga Teacher Training in Bali!
So I did.
Miraculously it was super easy and flowing, as if the Universe was at my back. On February 5th, from the moment the plane arrived in Bali, my heart was settled:
Warm weather, delicious fruit, spectacular ocean, amazing wild nature and animals, simple and unsophisticated people, ethereal music and dance…
Every time I came to Bali, my life was greatly rewritten.
The End and Beginning of a Romance
On the first day of yoga training, I wrote a short but firm letter to my ex-boyfriend that I loved the most so far in my life, and gently asked him to let go and stop contacting me. And I was ready to begin my official romance with Yoga—a lover that I met when I was terrible sick at the age of 16 and had an on-and-off relationship with ever since.
From the first day of yoga training, everything was just right, and it was naturally on the right track.
In this miraculous way, I found the rhythm and order in my life – this was the most challenging part for me.
Because of my habit of being spontaneous and free, I used to care less about details, frameworks, and structures of the daily life. Sometimes I feel that I am very spiritual in the eyes of others, and my ideas are very advanced, but my real life is a mess.
However, since I practiced the Ashtanga primary series every day in the Yoga Teacher Training, I found myself slowly drifting in the direction of what Confucius said: “following the dictates of my own heart; for what I desire no longer overstep the boundaries of right”—meaning that I could be free, spontaneous, living life at the present moment, without the need to be rebellious or against anything.
With sore muscles, sweat that slowly oozes, hair that is constantly soaked and then air dried by the sea breeze, listening to Sa Ta Na Ma and Gayatri mantra, I was practicing yoga every day with the waves splashing at the shore.
Rituals, discipline, health and routines that this Yoga Teacher Training brought me, marks the direction of the evolution of my soul in this life.
Effortlessly, I enjoyed this self discipline, which did not take away my freedom, but instead brought me true freedom.
It is the greatest self discipline which allows yourself to be together with the person, the place, the frequency or the idea you love the most.
This is the feeling of walking on the path of soulful evolution.
Even if you love someone or something to the moon, you will still struggle. But with the struggle, you get to grow. In this wonderful three weeks, I am struggling as well as growing together with my lovely classmates tremendously everyday. All the teachers said, this is an excellent class that they have not seen often.
There are some girls who are dancers, gymnasts and cheerleaders. I admire how well they can handle all the challenging poses, and they gave me so much help and encouragement as well, which helped me make progress even faster, and achieved poses that I never dreamt of doing in no time!
A girl has broken 30 bones before Yoga Teacher Training, but still maintains a good shape. In our eye-gazing meditation, we became friends in silent gazing, and we remain soul sisters through the training, supporting each other on each other’s lowest days.
A mom in her 40s was doing much better than me in a split, which makes me realize that my body is so stiff for a girl at this age!
Life in Bali is a life of multiple climaxes.
Just at the end of February, a few days after the full moon, something happened.
First of all, on the day of the graduation ceremony, we made a channel of love. Each person walks through the channel made by classmates and teachers in turn, and each person whispered something to the person in the channel.
A: I hope we can watch the Meteor and sing together at the beach again.
B said: I hope that you can complete your dream of swimming with whales as soon as possible.
C said: You are a wonderful mommy.
D said: You have a very unique kindness and friendliness.
Some classmates held me tightly… I cried very badly in the middle of the process, and my whole body is shaking. Suddenly I felt that my thoughts that nobody noticed me a few days ago was just silly. I was loved. All along.
Out of Yoga Teacher Training
So that’s what I’ve harvested from the Yoga Teacher Training in Bali, Feb 2018:
Lots of laughter, friendship, sweat, songs, nice deep breaths, love, healing, transformation—physically, emotionally and mentally. Everyone who knows me told me I am different after it—in a good way. And many of them started to do yoga as well.
I had been a weak girl since childhood. And I never had any regular, disciplined exercise—physical or mental. But ever since the Teacher Training, I’ve kept practicing the primary series then the rocket series almost daily for 6 months, then I found myself ready to transition to what I really love the most—dance.
My self-esteem was boosted, my girl began doing yoga with me, my Instagram fans suddenly increased, I got to do things that I never dreamt of achieving with my body and mind, and I started to hang out with different kinds of people—mostly yogis, martial artists, dancers and movers, who continue to inspire me to do even better jobs in my personal development and in my work.
It seemed impossible to be a dancer, an artist, or whatever crazy teen dream job at the age of 29, as a single mom who just stopped being rootless and started to get income last year.
But thanks to the All Yoga Teacher Training, I found myself capable of doing almost everything I dreamed of.
And one year after the Yoga Teacher Training, I’m going back to Bali to start my new life there, and lead my own workshops!
I could not imagine such great life without having attended the Yoga Teacher Training.
I’ll be forever grateful that I took this crazy decision to do it against all odds at that time, and even more grateful to have harvested Yoga—my lifelong partner which will only make me a happier, healthier and wiser woman as years go by.